Since the day that we got our news I have been fully blissed out for about 24 hours. It is the strangest feeling in the world that not many will understand but the happiness just didn't stick around long before the doubts and worry set in. Doubts that the test wasn't actually positive in the first place, worry that it was, but since then something has gone horribly wrong (been there, done that!) I was having a chat with a good friend, trying to explain the wierdness and guilt surrounding my feelings (I mean, I'm supposed to be the happiest I have ever been, right?) and I do believe she said it best..."welcome to the rest of your life. There is always going to be something to worry about, to feel anxious about...it's a normal part of being a mom." Did it ever make me feel good to have normal and me used in the same sentence. Nothing has felt normal in a looong time!
We have been for our first ultra sound and got to see the most beautiful little blob I have ever seen. Some breath has snuck out and a whole lot of happiness replaced it on the inside. It will be the sound of this little ones cry that will let the flood gates open.
(apparently my photos are corrupt! You'll just have to wait a little longer to see the dreidle!)
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